Why blog? I can say with 100% honesty that until a few months ago, the thought of a writing and keeping up with a blog was not even on the radar of ways I'd like to spend my time. I'm a law student, planning a wedding, trying to keep a social life, and dealing with cystic fibrosis - life is busy. And while I spend my fair share of time on the internet, the thought of spending time reading about other people's average, everyday lives rarely sounded appealing; and beyond that, I certainly couldn't think of anything about my own life that would be worth writing about or that anyone would ever care to read.
Meanwhile, I had spent a majority of my life squashing my CF, the chronic genetic disease I was born with, into a tiny corner of my life. It was there, I knew it wasn't going away, and I knew I had to acknowledge it a few times a day by taking my medicine when I ate, and doing treatments to keep my lungs clear. Aside from that, however, I had no interest in learning about the disease nor connecting with others who might be going through similar struggles. By ignoring it as much as possible, I felt I was leading as close to a "normal" life as possible.
And then something happened. It would seem the "grown up" voice of reason inside of me finally got to have her say. As a 26-year-old female with CF, considerations about my health and my future are now a bigger part of my life than ever before - and perhaps the most pressing of these current considerations is the possibility of one day starting my own family. With that in mind, I wanted to learn more about women with CF who are having children. And I didn't want statistics from research studies or medical journal articles. While these numbers and facts can be helpful, I always feel a bit of a disconnect between me and the author when I read them. Receiving information about something as personal and emotional as having children from someone who does not have CF but merely studies it and reports their objective observations just doesn't cut it for me. I wanted to hear from actual CF moms - I knew they were out there, but had no idea how I would ever be able to contact them or learn from them.
So, because I had nowhere else to start, I solicited some help from my trusty friend Google. On a whim, I started typing in keywords: CF, mother, pregnancy, blog. Lo and behold, such things were out there! And not just one or two, but several, written by women from all walks of life, and with varying degrees of CF progression and complications, but all of whom were moms (or trying to become one!). From there, I was led to the CF Blogroll. This was the true gold mine! So many CF bloggers out there, with so many stories, so many pieces of advice, so many struggles, and so many triumphs. I have never in my life felt so connected to the CF community, and I absolutely love what I am finding out. All of us have different stories, yet all of us have started from the same challenge, and share a connection the non-CF world cannot understand.
It has been so fun, so encouraging, and so enlightening to read the stories and musings of everyday life from these fellow CF patients - quite a change from how I felt about reading any kind of blog even three or four months ago. I have found a wealth of information about all kinds of topics that interest me, from starting a family, to new treatment options, to ideas for crafts, cooking, and decorating!
So, back to my original question: why blog? I've been thinking about what I could possibly offer to the world that hasn't already been done in another blog before me. To be honest, there isn't much - but I can certainly try! One hole I discovered when researching CF blogs was a substantial (if not complete) lack of blogs from CF patients who are also lawyers or law students. It may be a tiny niche, but I know we're out there! And so, the decision to create this blog was born.
There is one thing I truly desire in this life, and that is to bring glory to God. This calling looks different for us all, but there are three significant ways my own heart feels called to strive for this: 1) To love my (soon-to-be!) husband completely, deeply, selflessly and graciously, and to start a family with him. 2) To be a lawyer, and to use my knowledge and position to help those in need. 3) To stay healthy. I cannot serve, and I cannot love long and deeply if I do not take care of myself and my lungs. Thus, the title of my blog: Breath. Love. Justice. These are the topics on which I will focus in my writings, and I look forward to seeing how all of them develop and what kind of truths are in store in be discovered!
Thank you for reading. I hope that what I have to say here will someday help and encourage someone else the same way I have been helped and encouraged by the blogs of others. Stay tuned!